Some minor observations about my
experiences on public transport:
The person smelling of piss is not you...it's the drunk who got on at the last
stop and is now sitting on your coat...
The biddies flock to the bus at 9.30am on purpose because they KNOW you love
sitting next to fogies who smell of peppermint, violets & urine.
You have to wonder why the seat feels warm when you sit in it....?
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You're always sitting on the wheel when the bus goes along that road with the
speed bumps. Yes, that IS spunk on the back of the chair in front of you. You can't really hear the thoughts of the man behind you....nor can he hear yours. |
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Yes, that man really is trying to touch your breast when you're standing up on
a full bus.
That dead vagrant you saw on the bus on your way into town is still there. He had a day ticket, they can't move him yet.
The drivers aren't really rude, they're just stupid.
Of course the driver saw that old biddy struggling to catch the bus, but he
had to wait till she thought she'd got his attention and was about to embark
before he pulled away.
(Okay, not ALL drivers
are nasty...or stupid, I've met one or two nice ones...
hmm well, some are stupid and some are right bastards...
but they're not all bad...)
There's ALWAYS an empty can/bottle rolling down the isle...
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You'll never FIND something on a bus, but you'll NEVER forget that shirt &
jeans you paid a fortune for that you left on the seat when you tried to get
off with your arms full...
Buses really are like men...
you spend ages wishing the right one would come along, then you get on the one
that looks right, it's an uncomfortable, bumpy ride, it makes you sick, and in
the end you just wish you'd bloody walked...
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